Have you ever spent time with someone and thought; ‘you could be so much better if you just……’ let me help you fill in the dots: Shave more, straighten your hair, get up earlier, eat healthier, work out more, not wear odd socks etc etc. I bet at some point in your life you have thought this or even verbalised it to someone. Are you doing it now? Well I have to hold my hands up and admit I’m guilty of this! I tell my husband at least once a week to moisturise his face. His response every time is ‘leave me alone babe’. As he rightly points out, humans have survived perfectly well for 100s of years without any of the skin products we have today. Suggesting that he should moisturise his face results in annoying him (because I’m telling him what to do) and in turn annoying me (because he won’t do it)!
I’ve noticed that when you spend less time observing and analysing other people and just letting them be (i.e. loving them just the way they are), you feel happier! Now I can’t promise that at some point in the future I won’t suggest that my husband should do something this way or that, but I am making more of an effort to hold back. Imagine if the roles were reversed and someone kept telling you what to do, I bet it would become annoying and could also make you feel rather sad.
Next time you’re tempted to try and change someone, think twice! Does it really need to be said? Does it really matter? Will it make that big a difference to your life? Instead, try saying thank you to that person and focus on all the wonderful things they do in their life and in yours.