Don't Try To Change People

Have you ever spent time with someone and thought; ‘you could be so much better if you just……’ let me help you fill in the dots: Shave more, straighten your hair, get up earlier, eat healthier, work out more, not wear odd socks etc etc. I bet at some point in your life you have thought this or even verbalised it to someone. Are you doing it now? Well I have to hold my hands up and admit I’m guilty of this! I tell my husband at least once a week to moisturise his face. His response every time is ‘leave me alone babe’. As he rightly points out, humans have survived perfectly well for 100s of years without any of the skin products we have today.  Suggesting that he should moisturise his face results in annoying him (because I’m telling him what to do) and in turn annoying me (because he won’t do it)!

I’ve noticed that when you spend less time observing and analysing other people and just letting them be (i.e. loving them just the way they are), you feel happier! Now I can’t promise that at some point in the future I won’t suggest that my husband should do something this way or that, but I am making more of an effort to hold back. Imagine if the roles were reversed and someone kept telling you what to do, I bet it would become annoying and could also make you feel rather sad.

Next time you’re tempted to try and change someone, think twice! Does it really need to be said? Does it really matter? Will it make that big a difference to your life? Instead, try saying thank you to that person and focus on all the wonderful things they do in their life and in yours.

Charlie's Tips for Increased Productivity

It is very easy to get distracted in today’s fast moving world. Many of us find it hard to be separated from our electronic friends (me included) and with what seems like an infinite amount of external stimuli all around us it can be very challenging to stay focused.

So today I would like to share with you some of my top tips for increasing your productivity levels:

1-Start the morning with a ‘thank you’. Most of us will wake up each morning in a comfy bed and this in itself is a privilege. Think of all the things you do in the morning which make for an easy start to the day-hot water for a shower, food to eat, electricity…these are obvious things we take for granted, imagine a morning without them.

2-Get your emails and social media fix out the way! After ‘connecting’ with the cyber world and responding to the ‘urgent’ messages in your inbox, try turning your wifi off and limit yourself to specific times during the day when you turn it back on. How important is it to be online all the time? Not to mention distracting!

3-‘Quality not Quantity’. Remember it’s not how long you work for, it is what you achieve within that time. Avoid working hours on end, you often lose your productivity and energy levels working this way, choose instead to work in short bursts making sure you take regular breaks. I like to stretch my legs and swing my arms around but if you fancy something a little more discreet just turn away from your computer screen or find a quiet place to gather your thoughts for a few moments.

4-Recharge your ‘mental’ batteries. By simply taking a few deep breaths and observing the physical process involved, we bring our awareness inwards and learn to reconnect with ourselves. There’s a reason why people tell you to ‘take a deep breath’ perhaps when you’re anxious, or angry because it really does calm you down.

5-Make time for some physical activity. Take a walk, go for a run, have sex! Release your happy hormones and reap the benefits.

6-Drink plenty of water. This is perhaps the thing that keeps me most productive during the day. Staying hydrated is an essential part of living so don’t forget to do it! I always make sure I have a glass of water by my desk when I’m working or if I’m on the go I will always carry a water flask with me. Next time you feel that headache kicking in around 3pm, it could simply be that you’ve forgotten to have a drink of water in the last couple of hours.

I hope you’ve found my blog post useful, do feel free to leave a comment or subscribe!

Do You Make Time For You?

I’ve heard many people use the phrase ‘I don’t have time to do this’, or ‘I don’t have time to do that’. In the busy world we live in today, I can understand why people might think they don’t have time, but ultimately time can be made. Like anything in our lives, having time for something or someone is a decision that we can choose to make.

When was the last time you declared you didn’t have time? How did it make you feel? Perhaps you felt you were too busy at work to have dinner with your friends, or you were too busy with family matters to attend your social hobby.

Deciding to make time for yourself is just as important as investing time in others. Maybe you are one of these people who feel guilty for taking a bit of time out….well don’t! See it as a necessary part of your life to feeling happier. You don’t need to fly to the Caribbean for a two-week holiday! Perhaps a massage or drinks with a friend is all you need.

Invest more time in you and enjoy the ‘feel good factor’ you receive from doing this.

Tune In To Your Strengths

Happy New Year everyone! It’s not too late to wish you a HNY is it? I mean there are 11 months left afterall!

At this time of year many of us spend a lot of time looking at the year ahead. We focus on our goals and our aims, what we want to accomplish and achieve and what areas we want to improve on. We often feel very excited at our list of goals but the excitement can dissipate as the year moves on and we realise that some of these goals are not being realised. I think we spend too much time focusing on what we want to improve on and not enough time acknowledging what we’re already good at. If we spent more time looking inwards and observing our strengths, we would feel better and could end up achieving more. 

Imagine yourself as a radio- you have a choice to tune in to whatever station takes your fancy. Next time you find yourself listening to 'how you can improve', retune the station and listen to 'all the things you’re already good at.'

Enjoy your day, enjoy your week but most of all enjoy who you are and all the wonderful strengths within you that make you so unique and awesome!

Declutter Your Space

I often talk to my two best friends about the importance of decluttering and I thought this would be a perfect topic for my blog post.

We’ve all experienced clutter in the home or in the workplace. In my house, the most cluttered space is the bedroom chair; jeans, tops, t-shirts, socks, all get thrown on to the same little space. I find myself watching the clothes accumulate until the moment where nothing else can fit on the pile and it’s only then that I take the initiative to sort the clothes out! But what a lovely feeling I get when it’s done! Suddenly I can see the chair again and calmness fills the room. Does this sound familiar?

In contrast though is my desk, this is the place where I work and I need a clean and tidy space to do so. It’s such a nice feeling to sit down each morning to a declutted space. My message today is that I honestly believe a clear space can create a clear head.

So next time you find yourself surrounded by clutter, spend a few moments decluttering and see how it makes you feel!

Sky's The Limit!

Your imagination is one of your greatest assets! We all have the ability to think and create whatever we want in our imagination. However, often when we start to dream about what we want, our negative self-talk voice can interrupt the flow of thoughts by telling us we will never be able to achieve our dreams. But why should we listen to this voice? Don’t be afraid to use your imagination. Life is short and you only get one so remember the sky’s the limit! What are you dreaming today?

Don't Suppress Negativity

Every week at some point you will experience a negative emotion. Perhaps you’ll feel sad, angry, anxious or fearful. There are of course many different reasons as to why we feel negativity, but it’s how you deal with those feelings that determine how long they last.

I used to think that the best way to deal with negative emotions was to try and escape them. However, I have since realised that it can be very damaging to suppress your negativity. Imagine an issue that gets you down time and time again. You can cover it up very easily just by the distractions you encounter every day-but all you are doing is pushing it away from the surface-and it will at some point reoccur presenting you with the same negative feelings over and over again unless-of course- you deal with it.

So how do you deal with it? Well we don’t want to confront negativity with negativity! So here’s the hard part….next time you feel a negative emotion, instead of trying to push it away, try and embrace it. Show compassion towards it. Focus on the feeling and breathe with the feeling. Notice the parts of your body that feel tense or uneasy as you experience your negative emotion. And remember, nothing’s permanent. The feeling will pass.

I’ve been working hard on this one, and believe me you will become better at dealing with your negative emotions. You’re just re-wiring your way of dealing with negativity.